for me whom is in China I know the only reason for most of Chinese Abroad especially who are in America and Chinese American to blame curse and are anti-Chinese Party of Communism and even fight against it is that they find and notice that when CPC China and Chinese become weak they can get more cheaper porks, free money from government,more benefits and praises from their presidents.Opportunism.

I DON'T expect that communists who have stolen Chinese's money for years to give these money back to Chinese.but if they can just do something and use these so-called their own money which are used to buy expensive houses  stuffs abroad ,to settle lovers families friends abroad and give birth to their kids abroad , to show luxury lives and cars abroad when me who use all the money I make and from someone who help us by money which is dollar abroad to cash into CNY in China Bank for feeding cats, families and even myself in China and still be called  traitor by everybody,they will be hero for Chinese,and if they feel I make them shame and wrong them, I can shut myself up and kill myself for appologize,but the fact is, will they?but when they can't do it, go to hell!

I'm hungry.I only had half corn last night again. Dad promised me 3 times to buy chicken rice for me, and I helped him to fix the light of bathroom for his dignity,I thought he still is honest,he broke promises for reasons,but he just kept silence  and smiled,then this morning I mentioned it again, he walked away, and didn't response but pissed off.I thought if I helped him he would keep his promise, I don't understand I make money every month why I still starve.And nothing i like to eat everyday for me but need to  suffer mom's blames when i eat at home.I give them money every month, why they still treat me like shit.But I don't treat dad as a drunk all the time,only when he drunk,It's not my fault, I don't like drunk or drinker.Dad's demon when alcohol in his body.perhaps my fault to trust a drunk who doesn't even drink.It makes me sick at all.I don't like anyone make fun on me by food.Food is for keep strength and make people feel hope.And joy.Not fun and jail,To keep them inside like a slave or criminal.I haven't eaten well for days, my poo poo is green .And even no poo this morning.I eat too less.When I eat, they laugh and shame me that I'm a pig,I think they laugh at me who born in pig year, as a pig,But if I don't eat, I feel starve, even dying.Now I make money , they want money which I want to buy some food from me by more excuse.Is this called communism assholes?I don't know why.but what they do and are make me feel chocked,and  breathless.Perhaps I can take a long walk today,As far as away from this building.

it's strange that someone who are so far away from me love care repect and bless me,when someone who live with me hate me bully me shame me and hurt me so much.