I think sleeping is kind of excise or skill also for me through the gap.

Yesterday I saw a skinny kitten appeared when I put food for the white homeless cat around my apartment.It's so scared and I can't catch it and take it to somewhere safe.I kept trying and kept failed.it's so weak.the kitten suffers a lot these days.hope I could see it after 3 hours in the morning and it will eat something go keep strength. It's doing best to look for its mom.its meow stick in my heart every time.I cried after I return from trying to take it to the shelter.I think I know its mom.he tried to stay with the white cat, I give good every day for another white mom cat around the shelter which has similar color size of babies and these days one of them is missing.

I booked some expensive but useful cans which can keep its max strength in a short time for it,it will be delivered soon.money is running out,need to spay cats, indeed wish to cash in the end of this month unless miracles happen.

Why China won in ww2? It should not.It's been a big question for a very long time when I was a kid at communism school which keeps telling me that win of China and Chinese is exchanged by blood of lots of dead revolutional Chinese and communists, ccp is the best and the only one defeats other countries' badass and China gives me new life to live and everything's all right for it etc.someone who sound like monsters sucking blood can win any war in this way? Nobody can do. why someone like Japan who do right things need to apologize and surround unconditionally, why someone like Europe who help China to develop leave China and hurt inside? Ccp takes China into a wrong direction of history from the very beginning and opposite way of right things and goodness. China and Chinese become bad with ccp, most of them.wars which make blood bleeding and life die, it's never the way to win but falls in hell.

Why I help cats here? Perhaps , because for me they have more freedom or liberty than I do.but these existence of freedom liberty are suffering and being killed by me us who live as pigs and tools or trash like what we do to the whole world,I can't get my hands back which are moving to give them. Guilty? Responsibility ? Consciences? Use? Cheat? Trap? Who the hell know!? I'm totally sick about (stupid arrogant) politics effecting people to know myself.if anyone suspects me (and others) who save rescue help homeless little animals (or do any other worthy things) here with me ,you come here (in China) and do/try it by yourself! But I still thank God and you all who give us a hand.thank everyone and everything ,they are all worthy I know.(2:00~5:00am,July 19)

 

I'm back home.The skinny kitten was seen on the center of the road when I tried to look for it this morning,it escaped fast when I tried to get closed to it,I found a piece of trash and put food on it from garden.it's eating well for what I took for it a plenty of bag food with juicy fish can and dry food together for today.By hearts miracle happens always.but whatever I do for cats or not, if I don't do something ,perhaps I just and only can say is that I'm sorry for all.I don't wanna to apologize when I still don't try my best to do, or thank someone who still don't do their best to try . Not the time to give up still . (5:23am, July 19)