With love I'm real, so I'm not real without love.I don't feel I'm real, so I don't love myself.it's why I need others to love me for being real,but they don't like me as real, and don't care a real me and me to be real or not, neither.so they leave. I don't think I'm real when I'm with them, so they don't love me for real.someone don't like me living with parents, someone don't like me living with cats,someone don't like me living lonely only with myself. If they don't like them, why do I live with loving them? I can't live without loving others? any other else but myself? If I love them,why they can't or don't love me back? (18:22~35pm,7.20.2021)