left my apartment at 8:00am and return at 16: 34 now.did the operation,thank God finding her in the end who run to me with a male cat following her for babies when I was going to give up. and waited for operation in vet by half an hour and operation needed half an hour. It goes well.but need to set her free after she gets awake.now here to keep her inside and can't make her dressed for safety.I hope the wounds recovery well in next few days and she could come when I call her to have meals again tomorrow and don't lick the wounds until it bleeds. but the kitten's injury was more serious than I thought. The maggots were everywhere on its 1/3 body by the wounds near her anual, and full inside of her anual. I had to return to the store to buy some medicines and tools for clean and kill them one by one first. The fee of vets are too expensive darkly to pay for it. and feed her some medicines still to kill maggots .there's reason that she gets weak. Nature's cruel on another side.I feel I don't save ,but atone.flies and maggots know rules of nature.I'm against it.I know I can't be against God's wills. but the kitten run towards me for reasons,too.she likes to be pet and purring even though it hurts by alcohol and medicines . I want to get her back from death and have a long good happy life.in personal.a kitten which was called Gizmo looking like her died because of my mistake years ago after I met fox who loves her most. And can't ignore it and leave it alone.

fox told me today he gets cancer.he's still hanging on for the result on Friday .God bless him that it's earlier to heal than being late and it's bengin.I told him if he stops drinking and smoking I may become his gf, then I became his fiancee when he he says he stops them,I just want him to be healthy and love for a very long time,don't know if he kept lying when he still drunk and smoke,don't know if he smoked again after we break up or not.but he's a man who don't use money to enjoy himself but for his belief and faith and for you,help him stopping smoking.he's a good dad father and grandpa who will have his third grandkid.he's so busy working taking care of his families and don't take a rest when I keep telling him to do, he may not be a best husband,bf or fiancee for me, but he can still be my good friends.God gives him enough chances and time to do what he wants to do.it's not his time still.God bless the kitten making through and all suffering life, help me making my prayers to be real.thank you.

Today I lost 1kg in 8 hours.feet are hurt,so are legs.walk a lot and get sunburn which makes me itch for allergic of ultraviolet ray.and no time to do excise even when I want to do it,but I only want to stay still for a while.